Last time... a friend asked me... whether I think I have changed since school has ended. I think I have changed... hopefully for the better. Haha...

I am not so scared of life in general now.

I am not scared of adults now. I was scared of them cos I respected adults and I tend to be scared of people I respect. ( Ok... not to say I don't respect people if I am not scared of them)

I am able to voice out my feelings now. Usually... I tend to hide whatever I feel deep in my heart. Cos... telling people how u feel makes u truly vulnerable. Yet I realise telling people how u feel is the most precious gift u can ever give them.

I am not afraid to speak out my views now to people older than me. I used to think that since they are more senior than me... why would they want to listen to me and what I think is probably very stupid. However, I realise that people actually respect you more if you speak out instead of keeping quiet which I usually do and still do now most of the time. Haha...

I don't trust people so easily now. Ok... I guess this is bad... though its true. I guess I nv really trusted people in the first place... it takes years to earn my trust... yet when u finally gained my trust... you have gained it for life. The reason why I don't trust people even more now is probably cos of the students. Haha... the lies they can come up with... I don't know whether to laugh or cry... yet even the students who lie the most are so innocent cos they have this look on their face of true innocence when they lie.

I am truly happy with myself.... something that I never was for 18 years of my life (mainly cos of my square face).

I like my name very much now ( something that I hated for so many years cos it is so common and people keep telling me that I am the 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th...... Huimin they have known in their life) Whether someone call out my name now... I think it sounds very musical and am grateful to my parents that they gave me this name.... though I have not exactly lived up to the expectations of my name.

I used to think I am a very unlucky person... and keep questioning why bad things keep happening to me. Yet... I realised that these bad things always turned out to be a blessing in disguise and I grow as a person from it.

Take MEP as an example... I REALLY regret taking MEP. I utterly hated that subject. It was a subject that I utterly did not understand and guessed the answers bout 50% of the time cos I didn't have the ability to answer the questions and the questions in MEP are the kind which u totally cannot study for.Yet if I didn't take MEP... I probably won't have even thought of joining string ensemble... and play the violin which is an instrument that I have grown to love very much. If I didn't take MEP... I wouldn't have became so close to Michelle and even Xuhua which surprisingly I feel closer to her now even though we are out of TKGS. For all these good things that happened... I am happy now that I took MEP though I probably won't do it all over again if I have a choice.

I was very miserable throughout the first week of January 2006.... so much so that I cried (stupid me).... cos I was jobless. Haha... don't know why... just felt like I have been retrenched.... really wanted a job so that I can be financially independent (for the time being) and stop depending on my parents. Desperately wanted a permanent relief teaching job and felt so unlucky cos people could get one and I could not. But things got better during the second week... where springfield called me and subsequently called me back almost everyday. I realised relief teaching this way was better too... cos I know I will be super stressed if I got a permanent relief teaching job and I will feel really really guilty if any student fails their test because of me which will haunt me day and night. Gives me a chance to try out my job at Hyflux and even go to MOE HQ (thanks to michelle) which is something I really want to do but never thought of doing and never dreamt that I will get this job.

Everything happens for a reason... and with each thing that happens no matter good or bad... I learn many life lessons from it and grow from it as a person and become happier with life.